what’s self-love got to do with it?

Lately, I’ve been on the receiving end of some harsh and obnoxious comments on my YouTube videos. And then, in sessions, a few of my couples have been really unkind and have thrown hurtful comments at each other.

These experiences got me thinking about a deeper issue: many of us carry around anger and frustration, a kind of poison that seeps into our interactions with others.

Why do we sometimes unleash our inner grouch on strangers and, more importantly, our most beloved people?

“If you don’t love yourself, you cannot love others. If you have no compassion for yourself, then you are not capable of developing compassion for others.”
— The Dalai Lama

It all starts with how we treat ourselves. The way we speak to ourselves matters and shapes our ability to extend kindness to others.

You know those mean, critical things you say to yourself in the mirror or when you’re frustrated? Imagine saying them to your best friend—would you? Probably not.

When we treat ourselves with love and compassion, we create the space to do the same for those around us. It’s like giving yourself a warm hug and then passing that vibe along.

Yes, we all have asshole moments—after all, we’re only human, not superheroes. But what if we could do it differently? What if we consciously chose to be kinder to ourselves? Could this ripple out and transform how we treat each other?

So, take a moment today to reflect on how you can be kinder to yourself. Maybe do a little self-affirmation dance in front of the mirror—who doesn’t love a good dance party?

After all, a little self-love goes a long way, and we could all use a bit more joy in our lives and a lot more kindness towards strangers online.

With love and hope,

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